.....I'm back! I can't believe how long it's been since I've written. I missed everyone so much, but I really needed a break. I didn't realize how much I'd been traumatized by the loss of our Wyatt. Of course I was very aware of missing him, loving him, and all the grief I'd been through, but I started to have panic attacks. Usually centering around fear of losing Jackson like I lost Wyatt. I'm sure my chronic lack of sleep (he still gets up!) didn't help, but I went through really hard times emotionally. I just wanted to simply enjoy our beautiful, perfect, amazing baby Jackson, but I was and still am (although I'm feeling much more sane) always so worried. Every time I logged on and started reading, I started worrying about everything going on on here and if someone had a tragedy or a hard time, I had trouble seperating myself from it. My husband and I have had a lot of arguments which I won't expand on here, but that also made me close off a little. It was hard to deal with all my emotions. Thank god I have amazing friends and an even more amazing family. I have made some great mommy friends and I'm finally getting a little me time.