Still here!!! Update!

First an apology...I am SO far behind reading and commenting on everybody's blogs! I'm sorry, and I swear I'll catch up.

I want to wish everyone a belated Merry Christmas. We had a nice holiday. Just us. It was quiet. I really missed the big family gathering feeling, but C tried very hard to make it special. It was the first Christmas since I lost my grandmother, Mema, and I was pretty emotional. We always spent Christmas Eve at her house and even though the turkey had been cooked days earlier, the ham was super dry, and the cherry cheesecake was ALWAYS burned, there was no place like Mema's for Christmas!!

I'm doing well...38 weeks 3 days today. Last Monday (37 weeks) we had an ultrasound and he looks great! A big boy! He was 7lbs 4oz!! And he was in the 66th percentile. I've been an emotional wreck since last week's appointment. Dr. P made some bizarre comments that I of course went over and over and drove myself crazy about. When he checked my cervix at 37.3 weeks, I was still very high and firm. The week before, he'd gone from "we'll set your induction for sometime during the 39th week" to "let's see where you're at and hope you're cervix is cooperating". So last week, (37.3 weeks) he says that I'm definitely not in a favorable position for an induction. He then adds in that I have a very high cervix (I knew this, but never thought of it as an issue) and I have a small pelvis. He said that he's just not sure I won't end up with a c-section no matter what. He said Id be much better off if I let my body get closer on its own. Although I was surprised to hear this, I just wanted to make sure he wasn't going to let me go past my due date. So I asked and he said well, not by more than a few days. Then he went into the we'll see next week mantra.

I freaked out when I got home and pretty much all week. I'm crazy right now anyway, and I feel like I'm so close. I'm deathly afraid that one extra day could be a bad idea. I know it's not rational, but it's my reality!

So, this week, C came to my appointment. Thank god, because he's much better at asking all the right questions.and he was awesome. I was still high (but not quite as high) and I was tight, but we discussed it and given the pros and cons of my situation, we've decided to induce next week no matter what. I'm scheduled to go in on Thursday January 6th @ 4:00pm!! Yay!! We originally were shooting for Monday, but the hospital schedule is very busy and he suggested Thursday. I think that it will also give my body a little more time to get on board!

I'm so excited. I cannot wait to meet baby Jackson.






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Pictures!!!

The nursery

The nursery

The nursery

Me at my shower...31 weeks 6 days

The belly- 35 weeks 3 days

Lux chilling with her animal friends!

A picture is worth a thousand words, right?

Sunday

I've been thinking a lot lately about the holidays last year. It was awful. We didn't decorate anything, we didn't get a tree. I just couldn't do it. I was too depressed, and C doesn't care. If it wasn't for me, he certainly wouldn't bother. I did go to my sister, JR's house, for a lunch and to exchange some gifts with my mom and stepdad. I also went to my grandmother's on Xmas eve. C didn't do either of these things with me, but I felt like I'd feel more depressed if I didn't do them.

This year is so different...thank god. We have a beautiful tree that makes me smile. I've decorated and there are presents under the tree. I baked. Jackson should be here right after the New Year. These are all wonderful things. But there is still sadness that I keep trying to shake. My mom lives about 3 1/2 hours away and I can't go there for Christmas, and although she was supposed to come today with my sister, JR, my brother in-law, H, and my Nephew, baby T, the threat of a storm caused her to cancel. The rest of them are still coming because they only live about an hour and a half away, but I wish I was going to see my mom. The rest of my siblings (I share a mom with JR, and with my other 2 sisters, JA and A as well as my brother, B, I share a father.) and I see each other every Christmas Eve at my fraternal grandmother's house. But not this year. She died in July. Our first Christmas Eve without Mema. So sad. Normally I would probably be the one the pick up the tradition, but C is really not festive, he's an only child and doesn't seem to long for those family interactions on the Holidays. I certainly couldn't have really done it this year anyway. Just too much for me. We were invited to a friend's Christmas Eve party, but of course, C doesn't want to go. What else is new. I would go just for the interaction and to feel that Holiday cheer. I told him he better get with the program, because once we have Jackson we WILL be doing the holidays. There will be no more Grinch! I find it depressing to spend the entire time (we did Thanksgiving alone, too) with just C, his father, and myself. His father could totally care less. He won't even acknowledge that it's a Holiday. He sat down to a big Thanksgiving dinner with us and acted as though it was any other night. Not a word. Of course this is a man who does not seem to care at all about me being pregnant, but actually jumped out of his chair because he was so excited that I'd gotten a new car! C was devastated by that. Anyway, I'm so grateful that I have so many wonderful things in my life, right now, but I am vowing that next year, I will see my family on the Holidays, and I will enjoy them to the fullest. I try to see myself climbing out of the hole that I fell in last year, and standing in the sunlight...

I have an ultrasound tomorrow morning and an appointment with the Peri, Dr. H. I also have a bunch of nursery pics to post and some belly pics, so I'll do that tomorrow. I'd do it now, but I'm not on my computer.

I hope that everyone is enjoying the last weekend before Christmas!





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Prayers...Please...

First of all, things are wonderful with me. Jackson continues to ace his NST and things are moving along really well. I feel like I'm in a major time crunch with the Holidays and everything all thrown together, but as the days tick by, I'm getting more and more excited for my baby boy!

One of my dearest friends, who I've mentioned before, D, recently found out she was pregnant here's a little about her in this post.  She had some spotting Tuesday and although her HCG levels were good, her progesterone was low. The plan was for her to start progesterone today, but her HCG levels didn't rise in today's test. She was devastated and the OB told her she was probably miscarrying. They sent her for an ultrasound and low and behold there was a heartbeat! She will be 7 weeks tomorrow, and she's starting the progesterone tonight. If you could please just keep her in your prayers.

I will be posting way more soon! i have my final ultrasound Monday! 

Dates and other stuff

I asked the OB about the induction and he responded with a rather odd answer. I'm wondering if it has something to do with him and the Peri and maybe a little competition?? Maybe it was the way I put it?

Me- "So, I saw Dr. H on Monday and he asked if we'd set a date for my induction? I told him we hadn't discussed it yet. Are you planning on inducing? Dr. H said he was going to put a note for you with the ultrasound results."

Dr. P- "Well, that won't be until 39 weeks. And we need to make sure your cervix is cooperating. I'll start internal exams at 36 weeks. But it's not until 39 weeks."

Me- "Right, he said 39 weeks, I think he just wondered if we'd discussed it and had a date."

Dr. P- "Well, it's not until 39 weeks."

My guess is that in some ways Dr. P gets annoyed with Dr. H who just seems to swoop in and bark orders. That said, um, 39 weeks is kinda freaking close!!! It's not like I'm only 20 weeks here. I'll be 35 weeks on Monday! That gives me 4 weeks to the big 39 weeks. I'm a planner, I like to know. He softened up a bit and said that I could easily go before that or there could be other reasons to induce me sooner. He said that we'll shoot for the 3rd or 4th. Ya know, assuming my cervix cooperates!

I am so excited! So excited!

I promise to take pics this weekend of the nursery, and we're putting up the tree Saturday.


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Busy week!

I know I've been a slacker lately. I have many reasons, but none of them are very good! I think the main reason is that I always blogged at night in bed and now with my big belly, I really can't seem to find a position that I can type in.

Soooo...things are great here! I had an ultrasound on Monday which was 34 weeks and he looks fabulous. He's a big boy now...5 lbs 4 oz!!! Wooohooo! The Peri wants my OB to induce. I had thought this would be par for the course when I first got pregnant, but honestly I haven't had the conversation with my OB. The Peri said around 39 weeks. Sounds good to me. I had an OB appointment on Tuesday, but he had to run out right when I got there to go deliver, so I'm going in tomorrow morning. For some reason, an induction actually makes me excited. Maybe because it'll give me an exact date?

The nursery is looking amazing. I'm so happy with it. I promise pics, but we still have to put up his name and the decals, they just came today, then I'll take the pics.

AND...Yesterday, we bought a new SUV!!! We went looking on Monday, and found an amazing deal on what is seriously my dream SUV. Someone traded in a 2010 with only 4700 miles on it because she had really wanted the Ivory interior instead of the almond. Soooo, we got an amazing deal on a practically brand new vehicle that we wouldn't have otherwise been able to afford!!! I promise pics when we get it. I couldn't find the title for my car, so I had to apply for a new one. I'm hoping we'll get the whole thing worked out next week. YAY!!!!

I just wanted to mention one of my best friends. Last year she had a miscarriage at about 7 weeks. It was in January, and she's been plagued with issues since then. I am so happy for her and her husband...she texted me a picture of a positive pregnancy test on Monday!!!! She's keeping it hush until Christmas when she'll tell her family. Ironically, that's when she told them last year, too. I just wanted to ask everyone to say a prayer for her and that baby growing inside her. She's an amazing person and she's made this last year and this pregnancy easier for me. She's ALWAYS there for me. I know how much she wants a baby and I'm praying that this is it for her.