I've been contemplating getting a 3D ultrasound and I think I'm going to do it! We didn't do it with Wyatt, but I really think it would be a nice thing to have. My mission is to call tomorrow and try to schedule it for next week. I'm thinking that would be a good time. The assistant at my OB's office (who I LOVE), said that this is a good time.
I'm still not taking a lot of belly pics. I want to, but I just don't. With Wyatt, I took them every week, hell, I posted them on Facebook!!! I even made C take one last picture when we were leaving for the hospital. It's so hard to look at. My face is all red and I'm crying and I look so, so sad. I haven't even announced this pregnancy on FB this time and there are people I haven't told yet. I'm scared. Scared of somehow making bad things happen because I tell people??!!!! I know it makes zero sense, but that's how I feel.
I bought a baby book yesterday and started to write in it. I'm really anxious to find out the sex of this baby. I know I've said this before, but I think that will really help me to feel more connected.
Seeing my nephew and my friend JF's baby, make me happy and sad. Happy because it gives me tangible proof that people have live, healthy, babies every day. And sad because I should have Wyatt. He should be 5 1/2 months old. My heart aches for him. I also think that if I hadn't lost Wyatt, I wouldn't be pregnant with his brother or sister right now. I had a BLM tell me that she had to look at her loss in the following way- If she hadn't lost her son, her daughter never would have been born. And maybe that was the way the universe intended it.
I don't understand the intentions of this universe, there are so many times that they simply don't add up for me....